It was like a dream on an island, with the wind pushing me so hard and i fought endlessly, cried endlessly to get to the other side of the beach. I tried to save him, tried to show how much I wanted to help…That wasn’t enough, knives were thrown at me, insults were thrown, punches were thrown, slaps were given, I was dragged…pulled, pushed, wounded but I held onto this being .
My little life’s journey has taught me never to expect much from people, never expect to be treated how you treat others, never expect people to be there for you, don’t expect anyone to sacrifice anything for you. Same being I stood by and put my life on the line for at such an early age, left without a goodbye, left on a silent note ☺.
Checking up on them daily, weekly, monthly, hourly intervals could hurt when there’s no response, nothing but silence. Silence is the major heartbreaker, but heartbreaks strengthen us, make us better , make us cry and regret and curse and swear and so many unnecessary things. But guess what I didn’t curse or swear or regret when I got my little heart break (I call it little because that’s what my best friend and elder sister – Dr. Yvonne Kio-Harry will always call it when we talk about it… I quote “you haven’t seen anything like heartbreak you think what ****** did to you is anything half of what I’ve been through?. My dear leave that thing ehnnn, you never see anything, enjoy your life, you’re still very young ya!!. Have fun, don’t live a boring life.) I blamed myself for not being the house-girlfriend (same duties of a housewife )he wanted me to become, I blamed myself for discovering the lies he told me, I blamed myself so much for everything, I blamed myself for being fat at the time. When I saw myself so broken beyond repair I turned to God and that’s where I got the strength and boldness I have today, that’s where I got healing.
Everyone has got their love and heartbreak stories, just as one’s story is funny to one’s ears and agonising to another, mine is a mixture of stupidity, insecurity, comedy and agony. Growing up in the midst of matured persons and persons growing into maturity, hearing about their life’s lessons and hurt could have been my teacher. But no i wanted to taste the flavour of the medicine and juice of tears and pain they tasted. I wanted to feel the pain teen girls feel that cause them tk cut themselves at the wrists and arms (like in the movies). I was never a cartoon fan while growing up, I watched movies with my older siblings and I’ll cry when a tragic event took place with my sisters (even if I didn’t know what happened😂😂😂). All these movies shaped my thinking and made me go out to the society too fast, get involved too fast and it got me my heartbreak and damage too fast. But guess what it helped me have a tight grip to God and that’s just the best part of the tragic event.
Discovering you’ve been a side piece to a nigga you can say you gave your all, being fooled by his friends and your friends that knew all that was going on at the time, I can say I’m not afraid anymore.
Listen, my take on love is this, love like you’ve never loved before, treat that person that makes your heart beat at a different rate/ entire different level like you want to be treated, give your all like you’ve never done, show them you love them, let them know, say what you have to say to let them know…because you never know…your happiness may depend on it.
My take on heartbreak is this, be prepared for the worst, don’t be scared of being left or dumped or cheated on or lied to, yes its going to hurt but damn you’re definitely going to get over it, if you can’t handle being hurt, go to God. He helped me he can help you.
Make sure you live life, make memories and explore this planet, live marks everywhere and with everyone you get an encounter with. At the and of the day, you should say “oh well I had fun, I became the happy one 😆”